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How do i become a better person?
I am actually so disgusted of myself, i genuinely wanna be a better person. I've tried so hard but i keep circling back to the same self centered bitch ☹ I js wish i could js not give a fuck abt others so much that it feels like my heart is a bomb that'll blow up hurting everyone even if it means I'll be hurting myself the most, i keep wanting to be appreciated for what i put my effort into, i keep thinking only of what I've done in a group setting and undermining what others have contributed, i keep getting jealous of everyone and i always end up making them think they're not all that, when THEY ARE. I know that i should learn to appreciate myself and what i have more but what do i do about this craving to make myself be better than everyone else? And tbh im not even all that bad, i get good grades, have a good amount of extracurriculars, enough skill in what i do to be considered better than average, but i still keep wanting what others have. I rlly wish i can stop this bullshit im doing. Are these feelings of mine that i think of as complex actually js a facade for childish feelings to comfort this demon in me or are my feelings actually as valid as i hope they are
The first step to changing, is admitting that something is wrong with you. Your self awareness already proves you've accomplished that. To start, saying you want to become a better person is to vague. Try to think about what exactly about yourself you want to change. And if there are multiple things focus on one at a time. Think about what you'll d...... reply
If you feel like you are about to explode, you are probably bottling up your feelings. Try to express them in some way: painting, writing, singing, acting or just buying a journal to vent. See a psychologist if you can just to learn how to express yourself properly and see if what you are feeling is true or if you have self hatred. Good luck! Don't...... reply
you could try something like a regular gratitude journal but for other ppl's good points;; like writing "It's nice that Mary always shows up early and sets the table up for lab" or "Jane does awesome in verbal presentations and she fixed her references completely";;; but also it's totes normal to want validation or be competitive, just focus it on ...... reply
