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How do I change?
I feel like I'm not a person anymore, I'm currently on break from school so I have plenty of free time, but I don't know what to do with it, I spend my time in my team either reading yaoi or watching some movies on the iPad. I do have friends but we aren't really close. Every past break I was always the one who asked to hang out and texted first. I promised myself I wouldn't do that this time BCS im tired or always being the one askiing, it feels like I'm beging them to be with me and it's just pathetic. Im not a person who really likes going out but neither am I a person who loves staying home. I wanna actually go out with someone who enjoys my company and doesn't make me feel like they're being forced. I also always sleep pretty late and ik it's very bad. I want to socialize with people again and I want to hang out so bad, sure its nice staying home but it gets to a point. I wanna also find new friends but it seems impossible to do. Whenever I try they either turn out to be bad or just not interested in me. I'm also too insecure to ask. I don't go to some class or anything in wich I can see new people and I genuinely feel so miserable everyday, like I'm a waste of space. I wanna feel human again and actually have relationships and socialize with people. It's been 2 weeks since I've just been rotting around, I'm underaged currently so sadly no place will take me as a worker, I figured I could at least work and socialize but thats not an option. Please anybody if you have gone trough anything similar to this and found a way to break the circle, please let me know
Also I'm sorry if this may have annoyed you I'm its not pleasant to hear this but I'm desperate for a change
I'm recalling a conversation with my counselor in high-school. it was after I came to the realization that I wasn't alone for any special reason, no one in particular had any sort of agenda against me.(I'll admit I dropped a lot of people as well)
I think for the most part I was simply incompatible with the body of people at my school. I mean rea...... reply