i don't think either of them are making good decisions! that's very clear for anyone to see obvs. garam isn't perfect- as another commenter eloquently put it, garam sees jaehyuk being out and proud as a gay man as being something he will regret sooner or later. jaehyuk doesn't like it when garam speaks for his actions and doesn't WANT garam to take responsibility for them either, as he often does. this is completely valid. however...
genuinely what has jaehyuk done to make garam feel better about this like actually. because garam is also right about one thing: jaehyuk is too careless. constantly dismissing garam's concerns about homophobia and not taking him seriously would only make him feel more justified to do so?? he's also completely right that jaehyuk was only violently homophobic a couple months ago too, so jaehyuk spewing a bunch of bs about how no one actually cares if guys are close is something jaehyuk KNOWS is wrong. the ultimatum ONLY communicated to garam that jaehyuk either wanted the BOTH OF THEM to be out and proud and garam can kick rocks if he wants to stay closeted. even if in his heart of hearts he wouldn't reaaaaally do that trust me guys !! he hasn't communicated otherwise. he holds the things he does for garam against him even though garam never asked for it. i saw a lot of people saying he should be grateful to live in that apartment with jaehyuk- did we forget he lied to him about the apartment? like asked him to move in right after garam was crying about his mom having cancer? readers commenting that jaehyuk is too stupid to manipulate garam are just plain wrong!! lying to garams face multiple times is a manipulation tactic! please! garam is right to be angry that jaehyuk nearly outed the both of them? he didn't even talk to garam about it first. they didn't even resolve their argument both times before doing some bullshit! all jaehyuk does is escalate and escalate cuz he can't help it but to be petty and childish! mind you, his carelessness ALREADY outed garam MULTIPLE times!!!! garam has a say in the matter atp! like genuinely we are rehashing problems that they have already communicated about and it's just being dragged for no reason. atp just cut off jaehyuks card again
Glad to see someone sane here. Readers really tend to ignore Jh's wrongdoings and tend to make so many excuses for him because "he is doing what's best for both of them" or "he loves him or comes from love". Undermining your bf feelings, opinions and wants just because you want them is not doing what's best for them. Just because your partner loves you doesn't mean he is allowed to push your boundaries. It's just wrong. But....I'm here for the great shift.
comments must have short term memory cuz if you love someone do you really make them choose between you and their entire livelihood and everything they worked towards. knowing damn well what happened to garam?? after being involved in garams court case (without garam knowing)?? its actually baffling to see jaehyuk THREATEN, yes, THREATEN garam and only says that they could "work out a compromise..." in his HEAD. for some reason, after THREATENING GARAM, he ASSUMES garam will just KNOW that by "its either be outed or lose me!" he actually means "we can work something out!" hell... id be speechless too! just as garam had hours to speak, SOOOO DIDDDD JAEHYUK. garam has his faults, its true, i don't deny that- but pretending garam is stupid and jaehyuk... isn't, is ridiculous to say the LEAST. people can root for garam to crawl to jaehyuk as much as they want, but honestly, the most work jaehyuk has done on himself was accept that he has an attraction to garam... that's about it in the grand scheme of things. he's not actually nicer, he's not considerate, he still holds things over garam's head, and he doesn't take anything he says seriously. this story keeps introducing interesting concepts, but a lot of the time the threads are left loose and are "resolved" in a really anti-climatic way. i really want these characters to grow in a meaningful way, but that won't happen with garam crying and begging for jaehyuk back. both of them need to realize their actions affect the other, but jaehyuk especially needs to learn to treat garam like a person and not just someone he's dating, like everything he says doesn't matter at all because he's his boyfriend- like an extension of himself. as for garam, his trauma holds him back, but honestly... jaehyuk knew that going into the relationship? everytime garam has a negative reaction, it's always about how he feels, and he tells garam how much he does for him, and when garam takes charge and does things for himself, suddenly its a problem.. i do think it would have helped if garam communicated that he was gonna do that better, but exactly to what extent WOULD it have helped? garam is traumatized, sure, but that isn't the root of the problem. as we've seen countless times before... jaehyuk doesn't listen at the end of the day! garam sets boundaries, jaehyuk breaks them. an endless cycle since the beginning of the story! i wish garam could make better choices, but given the situation garam is in, would i have made better ones? would i really just accept a ring politely? would i really let someone i love throw their life away for me? would i really be able to face my past with ease like jaehyuk suggests? would i have even been able to trust jaehyuk with anything after being lied to countless times? after you get kicked countless times, do you run back to get kicked again? yeeeahh... nope.
this!! as a closeted gay myself i was floored to see so many comments absolutely dogging on garam and just praising jaehyuk like he’s some saint. im not ab to sit here and act like garam did nothing wrong but jaehyuk sure as hell isn’t 100% innocent either
why does everyone think garam doesnt communicate when he literally said everything so clearly to jaehyuk he couldnt have communicated what he needed to say better. attempting to out garam and then disregarding his feelings when he KNOWS what garam went through (he isn't clueless like some comments seem to suggest- he knows everything about sehan?? he knows he isnt close to his family??) and then says to his face that he needs to get over it. telling garam to come home when he read the note is another thing- garam set a boundary and he was already ready to cross it lol??? this guy was knocking shit over and yelling at garam, with a past of being homophobic towards garam, and he doesnt think at all that MAYBE, JUST MAYBE the space is needed. all garam asked for was space! and jaehyuk uses a common manipulative tactic- if you dont come home it's over! if you arent ok with me outing you then we should break up! like lets really dissect why hes setting this ultimatum that because he doesnt WANT garam to say "yeah youre right we should break up!" he chased after him like 848384 chapters ago (while crossing his boundaries mind u) it isnt like he wants garam to leave him for real. so why is he saying this? because he doesnt value garams feelings, he puts himself above others. he said that to hurt garam, and there is no and ifs or buts about it. the reason why there is no communicating is because jaehyuk isn't LISTENING. HE DOESN'T CARE. its not because garam doesnt know what to say, its because jaehyuk NEVER fucking cared about what ANYONE thinks, much like he's stated so many times. lol.
ive seen some people say jaehyuk had "come out" to various characters (his childhood friend shinjoo, his parents) but this just isnt the case- in every single situation, he was discovered, be it from a date with garam or from being found at a gay bar, he can claim being gay afterwards as much as he wants but ultimately that is not actually what coming out is.. im getting the impression that its ok for garam to be outed as long as its jaehyuk outing him but sehan so much as threatens to out garam and hes the devil for that right? what exactly are the stakes then if jaehyuk outs garam (albiet unintentionally) multiple times and nothing happens? why does jaehyuk not seem to understand or be afraid of being outed as gay if earlier in the story he was able to use that as leverage against garam?? im kind of tired of these scenes getting played off for comedy because it kind of ruins any sort of potential for jaehyuks chatacter and, as ive seen from peoples reactions, makes garams concerns seem trivial when garam literally got his shit rocked over being gay like idfk. jaehyuk isnt a "himbo" hes being irresponsible and careless even while knowing garams trauma... buuuut im sure this will be brushed off.. i hope something interesting happens but as of right now i feel like we lowkey lost the plot
I understand where you are coming from, but Jaehyuk has never experienced any form of prejudice, so he can only sympathize, but cannot empathize. This means he can never fully understand the fear of coming out, but is still trying to keep them a secret because he knows that’s Garams weakness. Also, both times they were accidentally outed it wasn’t great, but there wasn’t really that big of consequence of being outed in Jaehyuk’s perspective. He wasn’t outside to hear what his mother said and Garam acted like he was scared of them breaking up, but never said a word about what the parents and him actually talked about. He probably hasn’t even talked to them since because he’s so busy with the influencer stuff. At the same time the parents are probably swamped with customers and can’t do anything even if they wanted to. Also, with Shinjoo, childhood friend, after he put her in her place she didn’t out him to his parents first, so even though she talked shit, nothing bad resulted from her knowing. He isn’t going to understand the intensity of coming out until it fully affects him negatively. One other thing I should mention is that he isn’t scared of Kwon Sehan because it’s been proven he is all bark when it comes to outing them, because if he was going to do it, he had more than enough time to, and he didn’t. (Sorry for my grammar, I don’t really think about it while writing this stuff lol)
Long story short, author's writing the plot soooo yeee
throughout the story garam has been punished for not sharing every single detail about his life (be it punishment sex for not mentioning he was graduating early while they were together or pressuring garam to out his friend early in the story) even before they started dating but some people on here are defending jaehyuk lying about major things and even though they had a conversation about it he continued to hide things like taking his ex to court?? he has not shown even once that he values garams opinions because, as jaehyuk made clear, JAEHYUK decides when something is important in the relationship. their wealth gap only fans the flames- its easier for jaehyuk to show affection because he can drive garam to work, he can buy him food, he can get them an apartment and he can afford to waste money on a court case that he knows will only waste sehan's time.. garam can't do any of that but it's such an insult to garam to insinuate he hasnt tried either. he confronted jaehyuks parents even though that was literally his biggest fear, he invited jaehyuk to the gay scene (bringing him to the gay bar) despite the fact that he couldve just not mentioned it. a lot of what garam has done has been hard for him and none of it has actually gone well for him either but yeah throw a tantrum on his birthday when he was mulling over that too. good grief
Nah I get you defending Garam but you gotta admit that the argument was caused by both party. I highly doubt Jaehyuk would’ve thrown a fit if Garam reacted less harshly or hell, if it happened on a different day that wasn’t Garam’s birthday that Jaehyuk had to find out from a 3rd party. Think about it from a different perspective- Jaehyuk hides/lies about significantly heavier truths but they ultimately benefit Garam. Jaehyuk knows the truth would burden him, that’s why he kept it a secret, his lies make sense. Garam’s evasion of the truth, in my opinion weighs so much more BECAUSE of how insignificant it is in comparison. Jaehyuk lied for them to be together and Garam stayed silent for… well- because he doesn’t want to take up more space in Jaehyuk’s seemingly busy life. Of course Garam is trying- we see that with him taking initiative with Jaehyuk’s parents. But,
you can’t be bringing up your partner’s past mistakes when a new issue arise because you’d be stuck in a never ending loop. The conversation about Jaehyuk’s lies about the apartment was, as far as we know, over. If Garam was not over it, it shouldn’t have been brought up in that heated moment and Jaehyuk should’ve thought through his actions instead of acting like a teenager. End off.
EXACTLY. "garam is so insensitive" sybau my twink has trauma, okay?! jaehyuk grew up never wanting anything because his parents are rich and they love him while my mom garam who birthed me grew up having no one to rely on but himself, of course he's gonna have an emotional wall around him.
even if jaehyuk's lies ultimately benefit garam that still doesnt justify the fact that he hid things deliberately. they were never equal from the start.
"if garam reacted less harshly" all he did was hesitate, he didnt even reject it completely. he even said sorry omfg what more do you want. jaehyuk overreacted like an immature child by assuming garam didnt want it, threw it and even kicked the trash can??? if you read the story you'll understand the reasoning behind garam's reacting like that to the rings. he was outer by his own ex once.
ok wait i peep the bamby icon love to see a fellow plli fujo out! u said it all perfectly
why is jaehyuks employer driving the bus all of a sudden?? surely there could have been a more relevant character for jaehyuk to open himself up to...? his friendgroup he was gonna out himself to? maybe even shinjoo ?? his parents ? u mean to tell me jaehyuks having relationship trouble and he goes to Random Gay From Bar #2?
He cut contact with Shinjoo after she disapproved of him and Garam in the restaurant date chapter, he cut his parents off because they didn't approve of his relationship and made such a scene that Garam cried, and he cut off his friend group ages ago in the story because when he went to them for advice, they didn't take him seriously and were pushing for him to cheat instead of fixing things with his partner. He doesn't have anyone to go to other than the photoshoot guy because he kicked everyone he could talk to out of his life already lol. It's literally what Garam was chewing him out for over the phone lol
Yeah. It still is shitty homophobic South Korea, so you'd naturally talk to a person you won't ever see again if you cut ties with them. An employer is much easier than friends or your parents - and his parents don't take him seriously either way...
LOL yeah i know it logically makes sense but its just so jarring since the story implied that jaehyuk had regularly seen him for advice when we've only seen that character for like. his introduction and thats it. it would have been nice to be able to see a relationship develop between him and the employer instead of it suddenly just being the case that this is something he does and has been doing which is a common thing that seems to happen in the story
whom else would he complain of his homowoes? a young, confused queer seeking out the ear of an older, lived queer is a tale as old as the rainbow.
Yeah lol he knows three gay people he could ask, one he just beat in court, and one of the other two doesn't want to talk to him. God, Garam is so annoying