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5 Question for fujoshis from a gay guy
Ok so I've seen a lot of comments here that either pique my interest, or just really annoy me as a gay man, and they are more often than not from straight women reading yaoi.
So, I was hoping people could answer some questions.
1) Why do a lot of fujoshis wish that they were gay men, it's really fucking hard to be a gay man. We don't just revolve around butt sex. Is it because of the difficulties of being a woman and dealing with straight men?
2) Why are fem characters in yaoi so looked down on and called stereotypes? I'm a fem gay man, I wear makeup,I have long hair etc, but I'm still a man. I am not a woman nor do I wish to be one.
3) Why are so many fujoshis obsessed with the uke - seme dynamic? Like fem and skinny automatically means uke and vice versa, and god forbid there be switches. Gay relationships are not like that IRL, and it irks me when people say it's gross.
4) Why do you personally read yaoi? Like I read it, but mostly AI, because there's so little gay media? To me it just feels a bit odd, and some obsess over it to the point that it's like when straight guys obsess over lesbian porn.
5) This isn't a question, so much as just asking people to please stop referring to IRL gay men and relationships as yaoi. We aren't porn for you.
Sorry if some of these probably sounded a bit aggressive, and tbh they are, because I'm getting frustrated with some repeated comments I see. Particularly about fem gay men.
Hello!
I studied this term in college, because I asked myself some of that questions too (even if I'm female). To sum it up, gay romace between two men is interesting for many women because of the gender itself. First, as a man, women would not have to fear pregnancy - it means having fun with sex without that kind of risk (diseases excluded here)....... 13 reply
as a fellow queer man, this also really fucking bothers me. and the fact that they even have the audacity to say that we shouldn't care that they fetishize it? its that mentality that is damaging to us, and makes us feel uncomfortable 4 reply
1) A lot of your questions are in response to a certain TYPE of fangirl. I was a lot like this when I was 16. It's a fantasy at that point, and yaoi paints a picture that isn't realistic. That's what romance fiction is usually about. Girls fall in love with it, and then they want to be a part of it.
This attitude, however, changes as a girl gets o...... 1 reply
Hey man, I just want to say that I am so sorry that so many are commenting things that minimizes your frustration, even though it is a very valid thing to be frustrated about. I'm a gay woman and it's really hard for people to take w/w relationships seriously, because its always so sexualize for the male consumption that people don't consider it be...... 7 reply
I'm a bisexual woman, btw. I also don't really like to call myself a fujoshi, I only read yaoi and yuri every now and then. 1) I empathize with you. It's so fucking hard with my homophobic parents. It really disgusts me that people would only want to be a gay man for the sex. 2) I don't shame femme people at all, I'm really not sure tbh. There's no...... 1 reply
I fetishize everything that I like. I mean, I’m not out in the street leering at people, but sexual fantasies can be about any damn thing you want it to be about. The point is to keep the fantasy separate from reality and treat people with respect in real life.
This website is not the place to expect the type of behaviors that you should be able...... 7 reply
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Hello, asker here!
I just wanted to say that when I wrote this I was in a really bad mood. I had just seen an entire thread on how fem gay men in yaoi where gross and basically women. And a lot of people agreed so I wanted to vent a little.
ALSO, I didn't know that fujoshi was a general term for all female yaoi r...... 13 reply
1) I really dont know some fujoshi wish that. It has always confused the shit out of me as well. But is probably to think they could fulfill some of their fantasy.
2) i personally am not sure about that one. I never had issues or have seen any hate about that.
3) It has been less and less of that kind of matching up. Many people now want to see ...... 1 reply
