I'm gonna die (T.W.)

I think something was always wrong with me. Ever since I was a child.
My mom sent me to a course to learn English because other neighbors were doing the same with their kids. I was 10.
She wanted me to go to a languages high school and pursue English even in university. I tried to voice my opinion and said I didn't want to be an English teacher. I begged her. I said I'll be a regular teacher, not an English one. She started saying "...then what about all the money that will go to waste? All our efforts?" Dad took her side.
I wasn't doing well in high school. I was so depressed I cut myself. I have scars all over my wrist and legs. I tried to kill myself three times.
I was forced to take the uni entrance exam, which I passed. The first day I had to go to uni I took more than 100 pills in hopes that I don't have to wake up and see the ligh of day again. Too bad they didn't work.
I was failing uni too.
When they finally saw that I was failing and started listening to me and said that I didn't want to be an English teacher, they blamed me. They said that it was me that wanted this. I was the one that said I wanted to be an English teacher.
I dropped out.
They sent me to a technology course, to a math course, and I got accepted in university for Computer Science. I loved it. I was doing so well there. I don't have a job. My sister and my parents got a small apartment and I and my sister live there until I finish university and get a job.
Now they're threatening to not pay for the apartment anymore and they said fuck your university just because I don't give them a call every day. Because sometimes me and my sister argue. They're religious and they said that the devil is messing with my mind. I can't go to uni now. I don't know what to do anymore. The only choice I have is just to off myself.