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(TW: suicide) To those who've attempted, have you gained a new perspective on life?
a couple of weeks after my attempt I started to accept a lot of my self-indulgences, like eating more sugar than I should, or reading stupid ass shit. I used to feel like a failure when doing these things but now I just do them because I realize that it's keeping me alive.
Definitely I used to want to commit ASAP but after a couple failed attempts and as I got older I thought about how it would be such a waste for me to die when so much money into my clothing and food has been spent on me to raise me.
Looking back it wasn't exactly a good reason to stay alive as I was basically guilt tripping myself to do so but it ...... reply
Yes! Especially after I started therapy. Of course, I had some relapses, but the secret is not to give up trying to improve. One of the biggest reasons why I had these thoughts is because I have a very, let's say, messy family, I won't go into too much detail. And to make matters worse, I was a typical good daughter, but even so, I was always criti...... reply
Yes, but it took me quite a while. I tried to kill myself when I was 16, but I got scared, I couldn’t get myself to jump off. I was miserable everyday, and it didn’t help the fact that my household was hell on earth. I’ve probably been depressed since I was a little kid up till I was 20, but now, I actually wake up in the morning, excited to ...... reply
Not really? Life is the same as always for me but some of my very heavy suicidal thoughts have become more dormant id say. I think the only thing that changed is that and my obsession with suicide becoming more intense than before (not in the sense of "ill do it rn" more in the sense of being fascinated by death itself).
Maybe its because im just...... reply
Absolutely. I attempted back in 2020. We were in lock down, my family was going through a lot, and I got overwhelmed with responsibilities that were pushed upon me, only to be made to feel like I wasn’t doing good enough, and I was a disappointment. That was my breaking point after enduring years of depression and anxiety since I was literally ei...... reply
The only reason i m alive rn is cuz my mom ragebaited me so hard after my attempt. No therapy, no consolation just insults and degradation talk. Idk i went kinda numb after that, i m still pretty depressed but oh well. My parents like to believe and show that there's nothing wrong with their kid after all. 1 reply
yes and now i’m terrified to die. I didn’t realize ,when i was so suicidal, what death could really be like because i was so stuck up on just wanting to die and not caring where i went. but when i attempted and it didn’t work out i started thinking well what the hell could death/afterlife even be like, i started to get so scared i just stop ...... 1 reply
No. Instead of living because I, myself wish to live, I've found a reason to keep going. Rather, if that something suddenly left, I couldn't take it. I wouldn't.
In hindsight, I view the world the same. I view living the same. I view life as a whole the same. My perspective did not change just because of my numerous failed attempts in my tee...... reply
the only thing keeping me alive is my silly little interests like not being able to see my fave fic/manga/manwha getting updated or not being able to play the games i like anymore reply
